WRITING exceeds everything. A getaway. A free pass to journey beyond the walls of limitations, to have a blast somewhere we want to be. A door to surpass the confinement of our immediate realities and somehow experience and exist in a world we dream of having. I once thought that writing was a mythical thing. When a tree suddenly bloomed with gold and produced sparkling flowers and leaves. I consider it as something that displays no boundaries, or so I thought, at least.
Obscurity is my lane of satisfaction. A reader who simply creeps on pages, patiently waiting for the characters to meet and continue their love story to end. Fascinated by the art of reading, I wondered what it would feel like to write and have my subject of words of romance as well. And so I began to create pieces reflecting and addressed to you. However, those letters weren’t sent anywhere, instead, they stayed with me. Labeled them all as unsent messages. Not that I am not aware of where to mail them, but there is something more crucial than you receiving confessions of mine—the annoying moments of dauntless. Would it weigh the same heaviness of the words in the book I used to devour? Would it occupy your mind and haunt you? I imagine the ink losing its magnificent color and yet the pages of my letters observe the same amount of affection of longing.
Could I craft a letter where words dance with the music twinkling in your eyes? Could I equal the ferocity and melt all the existence of fear that lingers around? And finally, bear this genuine emotion like there is nothing to hide. And so I continued, wondering endlessly. If I dared to be brave enough to let things be the way they are, imperfect and perplexing. Or would I keep rewriting until it sounds acceptable and feels just right for you to know? Coward. Perhaps, it isn’t enough to write about love. But to be there, to live with it.
Self-love is becoming an essential form of empowerment in a world that often emphasizes romantic relationships. The practice of writing love letters to oneself, whether through journaling, personal affirmations, e-mails that we’ll receive for ourselves over the upcoming years and months, or video messages—is a growing trend nowadays. It’s a great way of reconnecting with who we are, expressing gratitude, and acknowledging our worth as individuals. Love letters for ourselves as a form of self-love equates to knowing your self-worth.
“I tend to value myself more sa pamamagitan ng pagsusulat ng mga love letters in forms of mga tula para sa sarili ko. Mas nakikilala ko kung sino ba talaga ako,” Christel (22), and a starting writer said, when asked about how writing love letters for oneself fosters self-love.
Likewise, Kia (22) have the same opinion, “Mas naiintindihan ko talaga ang sarili ko kapag nagsusulat ako, tapos after ilang months babasahin ko ‘yung mga sinabi ko to myself at that time. Because of that kasi, I can recall how I was before. How much I love myself back then and kung ganoon pa rin ba ako sa sarili ko ngayon.”
In the same manner, it is more about self-discovery. For Trisha (21), “I do journals minsan, tapos e-mails ganyan. Lalo na kapag I’m overwhelmed with so many things. I prefer to let it out to myself through writing and later on talk about it with my friends. This might sound weird pero para siyang rediscovering the old version of yourself?” A ghost of a genuine smile is apparent as she answers. Happily reminiscing. “For example, the last time I wrote a letter to myself was when I was having a hard time figuring myself out. And by the time I received the mail I sent to my e-mail address, at nung binasa ko na siya, I tended to realize how fragile I was pala dati. May episodes of “What?” Tapos nakakatuwa rin na malaman that I can be that honest and show that I could be weak too, lalong-lalo na sa sarili ko. It’s important. It only shows I’m a human, after all. So ‘yun, that’s self-love para sa akin,” she added.
Unlike traditional love letters we write that are meant for someone else, these letters are personal and reflective. Other people might still utilize handwritten letters for themselves, but knowing the trend is completely diverse, the people I have interviewed have shown different approaches to writing their love letters. Furthermore, there are several means of writing love letters for oneself.
“I use poems, since I also write, ginagawan ko ng tula [ang] sarili ko. Kahit saang paraan naman ‘yan e, pwedeng through songs, letters, and ‘yung sa akin e tula talaga. It’s a thing that I enjoy the most, so why not address the poem to me? Loving yourself is not that hard, basta totoo ka,” Christel said. As for Kia and Trisha, “Kadalasan sa notes na lang ako sa phone na ako nagsusulat. It’s more convenient rin, but if given a chance, I think it’s much better as a physical copy nung letter.”
This is how individuals use this creative form of communication to practice self-love, find clarity, and heal from past wounds. According to Christel, “Healing is not easy. It’s not a walk in the park. Maraming stages rin siguro, but in self-love, kagaya ng sinabi nila, there’s a self-discovering again. And this time, mas kilala mo na ang sarili mo.”
Meanwhile, Kia’s take on self-love through love letters mostly talks for the inner peace everyone should have. “Tingin ko, ‘yung naiitulong ng pagsusulat for me ay mas nagkakaroon ako ng peace sa sarili. I’m at ease. Knowing na may outlet ako and I know where to rant, kahit pa binabalik ko lang rin sa sarili ko ‘yun.” And lastly, for Trisha, “Safe space para sa akin ang pagsusulat ng journals. Naii-release ko ‘yung frustrations ko sa buhay at naiintindihan ko ‘yung mga bagay na nagiging dahilan nun. It’s like you heal because you understand yourself better. You welcome all your flaws because you’re not perfect and most definitely, you’re not trying to be.”
Loving ourselves is the priority in this world where romance isn’t about partnerships anymore. Learning to be the first person to understand our shortcomings is vital. An act to prove that love is universal, for the greatest connection we can acquire is within our souls. If loving means drowning in somebody’s eyes, then the only person that could save you is you. Not to tame the ocean’s waves, but to acknowledge its high and low tides. Healing, they say, is a rough journey. An approach to see ourselves better, in clarity, in flaws, and continuously thrive. And now that special day of hearts is approaching, celebrate and discover yourself. Be your own Valentine. Appreciate yourself even more. The greatest love story you’ll ever write is the one you have with yourself.
