CHRISTMAS is one of the most important and celebrated festivals in the Philippines. It’s a time for family reunions, gift-giving, and shared meals, all focused on warmth, togetherness, and tradition.
However, for Overseas Filipino Workers (OFWs), Christmas is often bittersweet. Being apart from their families around the holidays can be one of the most difficult emotional obstacles they face.
Photo Courtesy: Angela Compagnone | Unsplash
Along with the challenges and sacrifices of working abroad, being away from home is emotionally painful owing to loneliness, longing, and the complex intersection of duty and desire to return home.
It is a period when the personal cost of sacrifice is felt keenly, and the longing for home grows more. Christmas becomes a sign of love and duty, a reminder that their hearts will always be close to home, even from afar.
An empty Christmas
Christmas in the Philippines is said to be one of the most colorful in the world. Our neighborhoods are often filled with pretty lanterns and shiny Christmas lights. But for the 70-year old Marina Delos Reyes, whose son left the Philippines for Dubai this December, Christmas looks to be a little blue.
“Kung kasama ko siya ngayon, sama sama kaming magsisimba nang buong pamilya, kakain sa labas, mamasyal at nagkwekwentuhan nang walang katapusan,” shared Aling Marina, who wasn’t able to hide the sadness in her words.
Photo Courtesy: Marina Delos Reyes
She was talking about Erwin Delos Reyes, her 46-year-old son who, along with his wife and child, went back to Dubai after their short stay in the Philippines. Erwin works as a manager for a mineral water company in the United Arab Emirates. He wanted to stay longer in the Philippines, but he only had 10 days of vacation which doesn’t extend to Christmas.
“Sobrang lungkot, syempre,” said Aling Marina when asked how she feels about this, “every year nauwi kaso sa loob 17 years, eh 1 beses pa lang sya nag celebrate ng Christmas dito sa bahay.”
Erwin’s vacation leave always falls on non-Christmas seasons. This year, he tried to match it on Christmas but it didn’t catch on.
A little hope
But Aling Marina is not about to surrender her Christmas to sadness. She remains optimistic in the face of her son’s absence.
“Mabuti na lang at high tech na at puwede makausap sa cellphone. [Kaya] kapag Christmas, parang kasama na din sila. Pero iba pa din na mayayakap mo sila ng personal,” she said.
Photo Courtesy: Marina Delos Reyes
She was still grateful for the Christmas as she acknowledged the ‘blessings’ that were in their lives. As she looked back, she recognized how far they were now from where they came, when her sons were still yet to achieve the dream they’re living now.
“Lagi kong sinasabi sa kanila na salamat sa lahat lahat ng ipinagkakaloob nila, salamat at ‘di sila nakakalimot, lagi lang silang mag iingat at patuloy na tatawag sa Panginoon.”
Aling Marina’s positivity represents another facet of the celebrated holiday often eclipsed by the festivities and glimmering lights: hope. She still dreams for the day when they would be able to celebrate the Noche Buena in one long table, just like before.
“Darating din ang panahon na muli ko silang makakasama sa araw ng pasko.”
The ones that got left at home
Zyrix Laxamana, who has a mother and father who have been working as OFWs in Singapore for 24 and 12 years respectively, will be left with his brothers and sister as their parents will be away over the holiday season.
“In this year’s Christmas, my parents will not be around, because my parents are working abroad. They are OFWs and they only go to the Philippines probably once a year,” said Laxamana.
Photo Courtesy: Zyrix Laxamana
“They only go home once or twice a year, I guess, only if there are important events. The last time they went home was when my brother graduated from senior high school in August,” he added.
Given the sad circumstances, the 22-year-old Laxamana may have to settle for him enjoying it away from them. However, he is used to this because his parents rarely return home for Christmas.
Many OFWs find ways to deal with being apart from their families at Christmas. Modern technology, such as video calls and instant messaging, helps to bridge the divide and allows families to communicate easily.
“We always celebrate Christmas by a video call, because that’s the only way we see each other and it’s always memorable when we see them on the phone celebrating together. It feels like we are together with them,” he said.
A year long battle
For years, he battled the idea of not having them at his side more than the actual Christmas day, “It is really hard. When you’re a child your friends and classmates have their parents when there are family days at school.”
Photo Courtesy: Zyrix Laxamana
“And me, I’m left thinking ‘Where are my parents?’ during some of the most important events in my life when I was a child, like my graduation and when I shot my first shot at a basketball game.”
“You’re always left thinking where they are. But as time goes by, I realize that they always supported me every day. You realize that through the video calls and messages they send for you,” he went on to share.
At the end of the day, despite the grief of celebrating this holiday away from their parents, he has one thing that he holds onto that helps him stay positive in these situations: their smiles.
“Seeing my parents smile helps me stay positive. Their smiles have always been the most comforting and uplifting part of my life. Even from afar, their happiness reminds me of the love and support that always surround me,” he said.
Aling Marina and Zyrix are just few of the million OFW families who are suffering being apart from their loved ones. It is ironic that their Christmas— a season celebrated together by people— is characterized by such an obvious absence. This is a grim reality for many Filipinos— that in order to survive and live decently, one must accept the possibility of loneliness.
But the family’s loneliness is also a testament of their love. It proves that distance could not easily sever a bond nurtured with genuine care and warmth. Many OFWs like Aling Marina and Zyrix know this and hold on to their hope. They know that the blues that taint their Christmas only serve to remind them that there are brighter colors waiting in the horizon.
Tomorrow, we will feature the other side. An OFW who is returning for Chirtstmas after many years of being away from the family.
