Heads up Gen Zs!
Can’t define that relationship status yet? Well, it’s time to update your dating vocabulary so you would know most likely what to call your situation if you ever get stuck asking “Are we?” “What now?” “What’s next” and well, “What the hell.”
Here is a glossary of some 2022 dating terms you should know because, well, “ghosting” and “catfishing” are so 2019. Let’s see where you fall.
Have you ever been so thrilled meeting someone you knew online because he looked so freaking attractive in photos but voila, he just disappointed you? Fitler much? Well kid, you’ve got yourself kittenfished.
Kittenfishing is a new internet slang which basically means making oneself appear more desirable than he/she truly is in person. It’s like saying you stand 5’11 when you truly are just 5’4.
Next time, try to ask for non-filtered photos. Honesty is still the best policy.
How about meeting that dude who showered you so much love as if you knew each other forever when you only started flirting for a week? Well girl, he love bombed you.
Anyone ringing a bell?
You’re dating for months now and everything’s sliding just perfectly but you have not met anyone from his side of the universe. You’ve just been pocketed.
We know, girl. We know.
We date, we kiss, we sex. But we’re not together. So what are we?
Well, you’re stuck in a situationship. It’s basically having official feelings for each other while not being officially together. Yep, it’s a no-label relationship and it happens a lot. Right?
Although many may see this as an unfortunate situation, this is actually where the thrill is at peak. You two experience something new that gets you both head over heels and you feel like it’s working. Problem is, this is the risk of being left in a snap because practically, there is no commitment binding the two of you together.
And when the other loses feelings, he just disappears. Hhmm. Ever been ghosted?
Girl, define the label!
After you’ve been in a situationship, you gotta Define The Relationship! Are we in or out? You cannot go on selling girlfriend-boyfriend things for the price of a friend.
Instagram story is your best friend.
Two coffee bottles? Beach getaways? Beer toast photos? But no face-reveal? You are soft-launching each other.
It’s basically showing off very subtle hints to people that you are enjoying your life and you seem to be having fun with someone obviously but you don’t reveal to each other. Teaser as they say.
Quiet is after all better, right? Go girl! Just make sure you both flex each other loudly and proudly in the future!
The first cousin of ghosting.
He left you without a word and you were devastated. But you fixed yourself and your life and you just became the best and most beautiful version of you possible. Slowly he makes the move.
Girl, he’s a zombie. These are people coming back after leaving you behind as if nothing happened, as if they never broke you, as if they never did you wrong.
Some others however do want you back because they realized how much of a fool they were to let you go. But that’s after you’ve been wrecked.
Nothing wrong to get back to an ex though, just make sure he’s transformed into the version that fits the person of value that you are.
This is when someone puts you on hold because he/she saw a more promising one. Usually, the bencher gets the upperhand in experiencing the best of both worlds but, should the new one not work out, the bencher usually gets back to the benchwarmer coz’ it’s available.
Hey, assert your value dude! You’re not a benchwarmer!
Cloaking is another kind of ghosting, so to speak. While ghosting is pretty much going quiet on all communication channels, cloaking is completely blocking someone off your radar and leaving no channels open. Sad.
Him replying to your texts hours or even days late or prioritizing other things and people over you? Yup, you’ve just been a victim of firedooring. It’s basically another term for unrequited love. As they say, the term was coined because fire only escapes on one side.
You deserve the love you give and more! Don’t forget that!
Your partner or someone you’re in a situationship with keeps stalking and liking posts and photos of others on social media. Yep, we all experienced that.
Much like a cousin of a zombie, an orbiter lets a former fling know they want something again by sliding in some subtle social media moves like liking your posts or viewing your stories more usually now than before. Guilty?
It’s when you purposely post sexy photos on social media to grab their attention. We are all guilty.
Another kind of ghosting maybe, but a slow fader gives more signs of a looming “I don’t want this anymore” thing than a ghoster. Well, he kind of prepares you for it.
It’s basically ignoring someone because your priority is your phone.
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