Overcoming shyness: How to break free from your comfort zone

BEING SHY sucks.

I felt like I had wasted many opportunities because of my shyness. As someone who has never enjoyed being in the spotlight, my shell has become my comfort zone. But a part of me still wants to be seen.

Even shy individuals desire to be acknowledged or recognized, whether it be for their talents, contributions, or personal achievements.

At the same time, the idea of being in the spotlight can trigger anxiety or discomfort, leading to an internal struggle between wanting to be noticed and fearing social interaction.

I grew up shy, believing it was just a normal part of childhood that would eventually fade. However, this lack of confidence still affects me in my 20s, and every day I see how it negatively impacts my life, all in real time.

Negative effects

According to the website Healthline, shyness is natural, but it can be a problem when it starts to cause emotional pain and distress.

Truly shy people tend to feel self-conscious and uncomfortable in most social situations.

Perhaps the thought of meeting new people makes you feel shaky, sweaty, or nauseous. You might doubt that others are interested in you and what you have to say and worry about what they think during conversations.

From making simple phone calls to presenting reports, tasks that others manage effortlessly often become a struggle for us.

Thus, shyness can make it challenging to express oneself clearly, leading to misunderstandings and difficulties in forming meaningful connections with others.

Shy individuals might also avoid networking events or social gatherings, potentially missing out on career or personal growth opportunities.

So I thought: In this age where social skills are important, being shy will take me nowhere.

It was then that I knew that I had to take a leap.

Overcoming shyness

Shyness varies in intensity. Some people experience mild discomfort that they can easily overcome, while others face extreme fear of social situations that can be debilitating.

This can result from different factors, so understanding these causes is essential for overcoming them. Advising someone to stop overthinking or just be confident often misses the mark, as shyness isn’t something you can cast off simply by pasting on a smile.

The reality, however, is that you might need to engage more in social interactions. It won’t be easy at first, but over time, it will start to feel more natural and normal for you.

After all, humans have this innate need for social connection and validation. 

I deeply crave acknowledgment and meaningful interactions but find it challenging to initiate or sustain these connections due to shyness. So I always remind myself that being overly shy will not help me grow.

This doesn’t mean I have to be brash, but I need to avoid situations where my shyness prevents me from pursuing what I want or from activities that could help me grow as a person.

I want to live a life without regrets, avoiding missed opportunities caused by things that hold me back.

Even if you’re still scared, go ahead and do it anyway.

With reports from Cedrix Leppago