#ModernLove: Is the Love Singles Want Still Possible or Is it Just in Their Head?

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VALENTINE’S is just a normal day for singles, nothing special, nothing grand, nothing to look forward to throughout the day. Despite this, they don’t lose hope and still believe in love.

Neya Selva, 21, an NBSB (No Boyfriend Since Birth), said she still believes that she will find her destiny, as per every woman, there is a man for her.

“Yeah, of course, I definitely exist because of love, the love of God, and the love of my parents. I believe na I am born because of love. I am born to be loved, and I am born to love… I also believe in ‘love’ itself, the way I believe that there is someone out there for me. It’s just a matter of time.”

Being single doesn’t mean that they are sad and lonely. Not all singles are willing to date someone, there are some who are already content and happy with their lives even if they don’t have a romantic relationship. Lara Subil, 23, said that there are different kinds of love that exist, “I still believe in love as there are different kinds of love that exist. Love doesn’t always mean romantic. Love can be between families, friends, pets, and many more.”

Neya commented about herself being single, “I am not looking for someone right now. Masaya naman ako sa status ng relationship ko. The thing is…I am open to meeting someone but I am not ready to be with someone. I feel like I lack something and ayaw ko hanapin ‘yong something na ‘yon sa someone because it is not right.”

Singles, even if they haven’t experienced being in a relationship, are well-aware of the issues that usually happen between couples. Jao Lumalang, 21, also single since birth, was asked even if is not looking for someone at the moment, would he date if someone came, he still answered no because he wants to be financially and mentally stable first before entering a relationship. “If there is someone na dumating, I would still say no because I wanted to be financially and mentally stable in order for me to date someone,” he said.

But how do we get into the heart of singles if they are this guarded?

Their Ideal Person

Lara mentioned her ideal as someone responsible, committed, and mature. “I like my man to be a responsible person, committed, and mature. I want my man to be committed only to me, and have a mature disposition in life or in our relationship,” she stated.

Neya elaborated that she likes someone who is intelligent, principled, and a dreamer, “Gusto ko ay matalino, may prinsipyo, responsible, may pangarap sa buhay, and of course Christian and if not, ‘yong willing makilala si Lord.”

Jao stated that he values personality over looks. “To be honest, I prioritize personality over looks but if they also have the face, then, it’s just a bonus point. I want someone who is loving, caring, simple, fun to be with, and has a sense of humor.” Glen, 21, added that his ideal is someone who is respectful, has a great sense of humor, and is independent.

How Do They Want to be Loved?

Lara answered, “I want to be loved in a way that he assures me that he loves me, takes care of me, and the like. I want to be able to talk to him about everything and make me feel pretty, I guess.”

Neya, on the other hand, shared the way she wants to be loved in a more specific way, “I want to be understood because I feel like not everyone can understand me…like, alam niya ‘yong mga salita na gusto kong marinig as of the moment. I want to be with someone na hindi takot maging vulnerable. I want to be someone na proud siya kahit hindi ako proud sa sarili ko.”

Jao said, “For me, being attentive to details is a number one factor. Another thing is embracing each other’s uniqueness, understanding, and growth as a person.” Glen, on the other hand, simply said he wants to be loved genuinely.

So is the love they want still possible or is it just in their head?